Yeah, inilah dier pendedahan terbaru. Gambar ini dirakam dari sebuah syarikat pengeluar telur ayam dan beberapa telur lain (tidak termasuk telur sendiri). Menurut sumber, syarikat ini terletak di Kg Melayu Subang.

Untuk mengurang kos mengambil security guard berikutan kenaikan gaji minimum security seperti yg diumukan oleh Datuk Najib bermula tahun hadapan, syarikat ini tlah mengambil anjing untuk menjaga kawasan tersebut. Haha.

Dan pastinya anda tahu ape kesannyer jika anjing tuh dh berkeliaran di kawasan tuh, tidur, mungkin juga berak dan kencing, dan juga mengangkang di sana. Maka tercemar lah jawabnyer telur tersebut dan lagi menjilat jarilah telur mata ataupun telur dadar yg kita goreng. Kalaupun anjing nih hanya bergesel-gesel atau menjilat-jilat di bahagian kulitnyer ajer, berapa ramai dikalangan kita yang basuh dahulu telur tersebut sebelum pecahkan? Kalaupun kite buat, adakah kedai yg slalu kite makan telur mata kerbau tuh basuh dulu?

Pikir2kanlah. Jika terpaksa samak dulu telur tuh pun samaklah. Janji hati kita tak terus hitam dengan makan makanan yg 'bernutrien' tersebut. Makanlah telur ayam ayam kampung terutama separuh masak setiap pagi. Di samping diyakini, ia juga boleh menambah tenaga batin anda. Hahaha

Once upon a time two brothers who lived on adjoining farms fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in 40 years of farming side by side, sharing machinery, and trading labor and goods as needed without a hitch.

Then the long collaboration fell apart. It began with a small misunderstanding and it grew into a major difference, and finally it exploded into an exchange of bitter words followed by weeks of silence.

One morning there was a knock on John's door. He opened it to find a man with a carpenter's toolbox. "I'm looking for a few days work" he said. "Perhaps you would have a few small jobs here and there I could help with? Could I help you?"

"Yes," said the older brother. "I do have a job for you. Look across the creek at that farm. That's my neighbour; in fact, it's my younger brother. Last week there was a meadow between us and he took his bulldozer to the river level, and now there is a creek between us. Well, he may have done this to spite me, but I'll go one better. See that pile of lumber by the barn? I want you to build me a fence-an 8-foot fence so I won't need to see his place or his face anymore."

The carpenter said, "I think I understand the situation. Show me the nails and the post-hole digger and I'll be able to do the job that pleases you." The older brother had to go to town, so he helped the carpenter gets the materials ready and then he was off for the day.

The carpenter worked hard all that day measuring, sawing, nailing. About sunset when the farmer returned, the carpenter had just finished his job.

The farmer's eyes opened wide, his jaw dropped. There was no fence there at all. It was a bridge - a bridge stretching from one side of the creek to the other! A fine piece of work handrails and all, and the neighbour, his younger brother, was coming across, his hand outstretched. "You are quite a fellow to build this bridge after all I've said and done."

The two brothers stood at each end of the bridge, and then they met in the middle, taking each other's hand. They turned to see the carpenter hoist his toolbox on his shoulder."No, wait! Stay a few days. I've a lot of other projects for you," said the older brother.

"I'd love to stay on," the carpenter said, "but I have many more bridges to build."

A man suspected of H1N1 is lying in bed with a mask over his mouth. A young auxiliary nurse appears to sponge his face and hands.

"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed the young nurse replies, "I don't know Mr ******, I'm only here to wash your face and hands.

He struggles again to ask, "Nurse, Are my testicles black?"

Again the nurse replies, "I can't tell. I'm only here to wash your face and hands."

The Head Nurse was passing and saw the man getting a little distraught so she marched over to inquire what was wrong.

"Nurse," he mumbled, "Are my testicles black?"

Being a nurse of long-standing, the Head Nurse was undaunted. She whipped back the bedclothes, pulled down his pajamas trousers, moved his penis out of the way, had a right good look, pulled up the pajamas, replaced the bedclothes and announced,

"Nothing wrong with your testicles!"

At this the man pulled off his mask and asked again, "I SAID!!!!!: Are my test results back?"

Perfect breasts

Fake silicone breasts
( + )( + )

Perky breasts

Big nipple breasts

o o

D cups
( O )( O )

Wonder bra breasts

Cold breasts
( ^ )( ^ )

Lopsided breasts

Pierced Breasts

Hanging Tassels Breasts

Grandma's Breasts
\ o /\ o /

Against The Shower Door Breasts
( )( )

Android Breasts
| o | | o |

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small.

Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.

"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."

Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this take?" I ask

"They will grow larger over a period of years," he replies.

I stop. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?"

Without missing a beat he says, "Worked for your butt, didn't it?"

A research group at the University of Western Ontario conducted a study to determine why the head of a penis is larger than the shaft. After spending hundreds of thousands of dollars, during months of research, they concluded that the head of a penis is larger than the shaft, to give the woman more pleasure during sex.

Scientists at the Queen's University questioned the findings and proceeded with their own study. After spending thousands of dollars, and after weeks of research, they concluded that head of penis is larger than the shaft, to give the man more pleasure during sex.

The research staff at the University of Waterloo thought both studies were incorrect. Spending twenty dollars for three days of research, they determined that the head of a penis is larger than the shaft to prevent the man's hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead!
Dari Ibn Abbas RA katanya:
"Diantara adab peraturan yang ditetapkan oleh Nabi s.a.w ialah: Memendekkan masa duduk dan mengurangkan bising semasa melawat orang sakit."
Ibn Abbas berkata lagi:
"Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda ketika sahabat-sahabat banyak membuat bising dan berselisih pendapat (semasa mereka melawat Baginda yang sedang gering): "Bangunlah kamu semua tinggalkan daku!".
- Hadith Riwayat Ibn Abbas RA

Prime Minister of Singapore was awoken at 4am by the telephone.

"Sir, it's the Minister of Health here. Sorry to bother you at this hour but there is an emergency! I've just received word that the Durex factory in Bukit Timah has been burnt to the ground. It is estimated that the entire Singapore supply of condoms will be gone by the end of the week."

"What a disaster! The economy will never be able to cope with all those unwanted babies we'll be ruined! We're going to have to ship some condoms in from abroad... Indonesia?"

"No chance! The tabloids will have a field day on this one!"

"What about Malaysia?"

"Maybe, but we don't want them to know that we are stuck.

"Call their Prime Minister, tell him we need one million condoms, coloured white and red; ten inches long and eight inches thick! That way they'll know how big we really are!"

The poor chap called PM Malaysia, who agreed to help out in their hour of need. Three days later a flight arrived in Changi airport, full of boxes.

The delighted PM of Singapore rushed out to open the boxes. He found condoms; 10 inches long; 8 inches thick, all coloured white and red. He then noticed in small writing on each and every one:


My husband was an engineer. Since I met him, he was always an unflappable rock in my life. I knew he always had his feet firmly planted on the ground, and it seemed that no matter what else went crazy, he would be the one constant.

Three years of romance, and two years of marriage later, I got tired. He was the most unromantic man I know. He never bought me flowers, he never surprised me, and nothing changed in our marriage.

After some time, I finally found the courage to tell him that I wanted to leave him. He just sat there, speechless. My heart froze. What kind of man was I married to that didn't even know what to say to make me stay?

After a while, he spoke, "What can I do to change your mind?".

"I will stay if you can give me a good answer to this question," I replied coldly. "If I asked for a flower that grew on a cliff, and you knew that getting it for me means certain death, would you get it for me?".

His face grew troubled.

"Can I give you an answer tomorrow morning?" he asked. Hearing that kind of answer, my heart died. I knew that I could never be happy with a man who couldn't even give me a answer straight away.

The next morning, when I woke up, he was missing. In the living room, under a warm glass of milk, was a note. My eyes grew misty as I read it...

A fire alarm rang at 4 PM in a large office when almost all employees were in office (approx 5000). As usual the entire office was evacuated within 3mins & all employees gathered outside the office in the designated area waiting for further announcement.

The Security Officer in charge made the following announcement:

"Dear employees - with sincere regret I have been asked to announce that for many of you it will be your last evacuation drill. Due to the recession the company is laying off almost 50% of its employees. So when this
announcement finishes, I ask all of you to move back into the building and if your swipe card does not work then it means you have been laid off in which case you will not be allowed inside and all your belongings will be couriered to you by tomorrow.

The Company has used this innovative approach as we didn't want to fill up the email box with lay-off mails and good bye mails in thousands & also to avoid any fight inside the office and the consequent security issue for all staff.

Hope you have had a rewarding career with us and all the best ahead. Please move back in & try your luck"
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